Were you fooled?

So in the grocery store a few days ago, I was standing next to the refrigerated fish delicacies considering if I was in the mood to buy some smoked salmon. Since there are no real bagels in this country (although I have heard rumor that they do exist in Berlin), the whole bagels with cream cheese and lox (yeah, that's how they spell "smoked salmon" in the US) thing gets kind of...lost. Nevertheless, I have learned to enjoy a piece of smoked salmon on German bread. Alas, one must adapt. And in the end...the brown whole grain bread is significantly better for me than a bagel.

Anyway, so I was standing there considering when suddenly I noticed a new product: Russian caviar. Not a "new" product really, just new to the corner grocery store where I shop most of the time. I buy caviar once in awhile - I like the salmon and trout caviar they sell - just the cheap stuff - and also eat it on a piece of dark german bread once in a while. I've never really been one to spring for the 50 bucks an ounce beluga caviar in a fancy restaurant - caviar is nice, but nothing that sends me over the moon - neither the expensive or the cheap variety. And spending that kind of money on fish eggs feels sort of as wasteful and superfluous as that liquor you can buy with gold flakes in it. What is it called? Goldwasser or something...yeah, Goldwasser.

Russian caviar is generally expensive stuff. So I was perplexed at the price tag for a fairly sizable portion (about 2 ounces): 5.99 euros. Russian caviar - even the sort of medium grade quality...if it comes from sturgeon...should go for at least 30 euros or so... First thought was..."oh, must be some sort of farmed variety?" I picked it up. Beautiful packaging. Heavy glass, good print on the metal top...well, you can see for yourself. It took me about a minute, but I finally saw it and had to laugh. :-)


It's not caviar. It's "caviar substitute." Check out the back of the packaging:


Ok, I'll translate for you.
"Tzar Caviar is a pleasure on potatoes, with egg, or served as the classic Russian variation with blinis. It is also a true delight simply eaten pure."

"Caviar substitute with mackerel meat protein refined with 10% olive oil, formed and colored."

"Ingredients: water, mackerel, olive oil, salt, thickener e440, preservative e202 e211, coloring - ink from octopus, and acidifier - citric acid."

Ok. QUITE interesting. And it reminded me of two things: Ferran Adria, the famous el Bulli chef from Spain who spends a good portion of the year in his chemistry lab creating all kinds of crazy food forms. I think he and Thomas Keller and lately Rene Redzepi of Noma in Denmark have all become quite famous because they are able to create the unexpected - "food as experience." (As well as delicious food...) And...it reminded me of a recipe I saw a few months back and intend to try out. Because I think it is with this method that that fake caviar was created.

So the critical question: did I buy it? I did. Had to at that point. And? Well, not bad but also not good. It lacked the perfect texture of caviar (not enough bite - the "eggs" didn't pop when you bit down on them like the real stuff) and also the flavor was close...but not close enough. I do wonder though...if someone had served it to me and I hadn't known it was fake, would I have noticed? I would like to think so, but I can't be positive. So...to conclude, with the terrible pillaging of sturgeon and other deep water fish that occurs these days such that the fish will soon face extinction...this is a reasonable substitute for those who can't live without....fish eggs.